Hello, apologies for the delay in blogging, this blog will be my last one for 2019,
Listening has something which has always fascinated me and which is really important to me. If someone feels listened to they can feel heard, validated, believed in. It can be such a powerful tool in communication.
Listening to someone is also understanding that it is something which takes time so that the other person believes that they matter and have important contributions to offer. It’s giving that person time to speak and able to put their trust in you. It’s taking the time to empathise and realise that there may be more to them and to their story.
The world we live in is such fast-paced, especially with the rise of social media. This can leave those who maybe need time feeling left out or misunderstood. People can take a snapshot of what may assume they know a lot more. This was spoken about at the Dyspraxia Foundation Conference in London in the summer. Little things can make a huge difference.
As a quieter person who has anxiety and social anxiety, I know what it’s like to feel left out and people assuming that there’s nothing more to me, often focusing more outspoken others. It can affect my self-esteem, confidence, mood and anxiety. I understand people can be wary to include people who are quieter, experience anxiety or other difficulties e.g dyspraxia.
Little adjustments such as: understanding if someone needs to leave early, or find a quieter space can be helpful and reassuring that they still enjoy their company. Often those of us who lack confidence can feel like we don’t have anything interesting or important to say, we just need to believe we do and feel listened to rather than misunderstood. It’s still really lovely to be invited and included. Even if someone may decide that something is not for them.
As a dyspraxic, this can also apply physical activities and there being more so there are more options for more supportive, inclusive activities to participate in.
A positive of being a very emotional sensitive person, is that it has made me a caring and empathetic and I hope I take the time to listen to others whether humans or animals. However, I struggle to not take things personally, and can be sensitive to the tone of voice and perceived criticism and rejection. I’m a very deep thinker as you may gather from reading these blog posts I’m a huge over-thinker and worrier due to anxiety and low mood. I can struggle to communicate my feelings and thoughts so can be hard for those around me see me being hard on myself and getting overwhelmed, but my counsellor is trying to help me believe that I do matter and am important.
These things take time and time to discover what might help. Which is still very much ongoing for me. We are all different and have our own journeys in our own time frame.
You never know what you might learn from someone. You might even be surprised. Please take the time to read my boyfriend Matt’s blog: Quiet people have a voice too.
I’m so grateful to those who do give me time and stand by me; and my border collie Toby who offers unconditional love. Thank you for reading my blog. Next year I hope to be kinder to myself and believe in myself more, build up my confidence and manage my anxiety/low mood.
It’s really important that people feel that their voices matter and feel valued and appreciated.
I really hope this year is kinder to everyone, wishing you a Happy New Year.
Until next time….
